Friday, October 8

T4A-Empowered to Connect

I was completely taken away by Dr. Purvis. I was excited to hear her speak. I felt a little star stuck when I first saw her. She is gentle, soft spoken, emotional and brilliant. I hope to be as great as she is when I am older. I was amazed at some of the stories she told and of the video clips of her interacting with the kids from one of her camps. I thought to myself while watching her calm a little girl down (who was crying so hard she couldn't talk), "wow she's like the dog whisperer but with kids! She is a hurt child whisperer!" She has such a gentle and tender touch with these kids it is amazing! These kids she works worth come from really hard places and they just crumble at her touch and voice. She works at the Institute for Child Development at TCU. She studies psychology and brain development. She bases all of her theories on biblical truths and uses her PHD to glorify the kingdom of God. She specializes or works most with families who have adopted older children who have come from hard places.  I feel so blessed to have heard her speak before we get our sweet baby. I couldn't wait to get home and try some of her ways on my boys. It is so practical and makes total sense. Her book it called The Connected Child. I highly recommend it. Here are some quotes from her that I jotted down during my sessions. I felt really moved my them all. It was so powerful to me that it was hard to take it all in at once. 

- Give your children a voice - let them have the ability to cry out for their needs.
- We are designed for connection. 
- You could have 15 biological children but when you adopt 1 child from a hard place you have to start   over at ground zero.
- The most tender-hearted children if not cherished and loved in early childhood will become the most aggressive.
- Relationship is Primary. If we are fixed on a parenting strategy then we will fail the child. You have to be in tune to the relationship with each individual child. 
- Women naturally cradle their children on their left. those who cradle on the right are depressed. why? because love/bonding/connection are a right brain activity. 
- Dis-attached mothers and depressed mother touch their babies with their finer tips. Attached mothers will touch their babies with the palm of their hand. 
- Our past plays a key role in how we parent our children. We must over come our past to effectivly parent our kids. 

Those are just some of the moving and powerful things she shared. There are many many more. Read her book. It is amazing. We heard many many sad foster home stories from her. She has worked with the hardest kids. Kids who have committed murder. She said she has never met a kid that was so hurt and wounded that there was no hope for healing. No child is beyond healing. 

picture of Dr. Purvis with her book. 

There are alot of video sessions you can watch on Vimeo. I highly recommend them. Also there are many resources at

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