I have been robbed for far too long.
John 10:10 (NIV) "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy..."
The thief meaning... Satan, the devil or the enemy (which I like to refer to him as).
Almost a year ago today Phillip and I announced that we are adopting. Many of you may be familiar with this post that we co-wrote a year ago. (If you are new to following my blog and would like to get caught up on our journey click on the hyperlinked words in the last sentence.) As I reread my words that I wrote on that day, my eyes fill with tears. Tears of brokenness, humility, anger, amazement and joy.
Brokenness and humility because at times on this journey I had lost sight of Gods sovereignty, truth and faithfulness. Anger because in my moments and times of weakness and vulnerability the enemy crept in and robbed me. He saw a crack around my heart and slipped right in and stole what was mine. He is a thief out to steal, kill and destroy. He is, like I have said before on here, a lion looking for someone to devour. The enemy's schemes are tricky, smart and invading. He caught me at moments where I haven't been standing firm. Oh how I wished I had always stood firm.
This whole process of adopting has been so difficult. I assume easier then some others but so difficult for me. When I first felt like God was calling up to adopt a little over two years ago I had no idea what kind of ride we were in for. I guess I thought because it was something God had placed in our hearts it was going to be easy. Because... if it is God then it should be smooth and easy right?! Oh my word... let me just say that, is so far from truth. Just because God is in it and God ordained it does not mean that it is easy. Living out the Gospel is HARD, inconvenient, painful and it does wacky things to your emotions. When you step out and lean on God to guide your steps you stick your neck out there for all kinds of attacks. I think when we are truly walking in obedience we are marked with a red flag and the enemy charges like a bull in a fight.
Well I am a child of God and the Enemy has no authority in my life and he does not and will not have the power to rob from me. I will not stand in doubt, fear or worry. Mostly and the point of the blog post is that he will not longer steal MY JOY!!! He cannot have it. He has tried to steal and for a few weeks he had it but, not any more. And since he doesn't have any control over my emotions or feelings, I have an announcement to make.
I wasn't going to make this announcement publicly (I have told some of you in person) because of what happened last time. But I am stepping out in faith that this time everything will be ok! First, there's something you need to know about me. I DO NOT handle public grieving or sadness well. I wear me emotions on my sleeve and it is not pretty. I don't like for anyone to know when I am hurting or discouraged for some reason I have made myself to believe that those emotions are weak and I am not about to be seen as a weak person.
Truth is... I am weak but my Jesus is strong and when I am in him... I AM STRONG!
!!!!!!!!WE HAVE A COURT DATE!!!!!!!!
We will be going to Ethiopia...God willing of course...
NOVEMBER 3!!! for our NOVEMBER 7th COURT DATE!!!!!!
Can I get a Hallelujah!!!!
Man! It feels great to tell you all that! Now you all know and you know that we have a lot to be hopeful for. Please be in prayer that our MOWA letter will be on time and that the process will run smooth. God has been moving big in Phillip and I's hearts so please be in prayer for discernment, wisdom, clarity and favor. Also please pray for M's mother. I cannot imagine being in her shoes. Please pray that the holy spirit will surround her and us during this time. Thank you all for sharing in our excitement with and for continually praying with us over the last year or so. You all are really great!!