Friday, February 10

Update on life.

 Emme has been home for almost 3 weeks. It has been really great! I am so thankful to finally have her home. I am loving this life as momma of three. I actually think having 3 is easier then having 2 because they stay entertained and play so well together. (This may change but I am praying it sticks) Emme has made several little friends all though she hasn't figured out that actually playing with them instead of sitting with momma is way more fun.

Her and her new friend Claire

Beckham and Emme are best friends. It is so sweet! I love to watch them play. He is a great brother to her. He will play dolls and dress up with her like its no big deal. In return she plays Star Wars and does her best to pretend she is a ninja. The other day I found them sitting on opposite ends of the sofa in our playroom taking turns tickling each others feet. Precious!

As time got closer and closer to bringing Emme home I was overcome with some fears that Beckham would have hard time adjusting to the whole thing. Beckham is a crazy mommas boy! He doesn't even like Phillip getting to close to me. So naturally I was so scared of hurting him. So, we were really surprised when we got home and him and Emme became best friend immediately. The one who had the hardest time was Parker. I never even thought he would struggle with it. We just assumed that because he was older he understood. Well on the 3rd or 4th night while I was tucking Parker in he started to cry. When I asked him what was wrong He said "Mom, can't you just adopt one my size too?" I replied "Sure! Just ask God if its ok and we will!" I really would. :) Phillip spent a lot of one on one time with Parker the first 2 weeks and explained to him that Emme and Beckham just get a long really well because they are the exact same size and basically the same age. It wasn't that she didn't dislike him or anything. And he explained to Parker how Emme really prefers to be with Me instead of him so, Parker and Phillip are the same. After that he has taken on the role of Big Brother and has done a great job! He likes to help her get things down from the shelves in the playroom and he likes to explain to her what everything is really loudly and slowly! HA! I always tell him that she's not deaf...She just doesn't speak english... ;)

Emme has done just as great as her brothers. She has jumped into our family smoothly. It's like she has always been here. We have only had a couple of little bumps but its ok! Our biggest challenge with her right now is getting her to see that WE are her Mommy and Daddy and WE are her providers and caretakers.  We have had to have a closed home policy. Its kind of like putting a bubble around your family. It's a form of shutting off so that we can establish our family unit for her. When new people come over and hold her and play with her she detaches from us and attaches to them. She starts giving us ugly looks and at times swats us away. It is at times hurtful because you pour yourself out so much for this child and in return when someone different shows up she prefers them. We know it is a result of lack of consistency in her life so its ok. We aren't devastated. We are surviving and figuring things out as we go. And establishing boundaries as we see need for them. Each week that goes by she gets better and better. She now is to where she will, on her own, come and kiss me wether it be on my legs, arm, face or belly and tell me "I  WOOV OUU!" (I Love You) When her and I sit in her rocker in her room before nap she requests special songs that we sing together (Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star and How Great is Our God) she traces my hands and face. It is those simple things that melt my heart and bring tears to my eyes.

We have only had 2 "Emotional Breakdowns". I call them emotional breakdowns because they were really really emotional moments. Last Friday I had to wake Emme up from her nap so that we could get Parker from school. When I went into her room to wake her up I found her covered in sweat. I mean COVERED. She had on a little sweater dress and you could visibly see sweat rings around her neck, in the creases of her arms, across her chest. When I picked her up, her hair was wet with sweat. I hadn't put her under the covers so I knew she wasn't hot. When she finally woke up she began to sob. It wasn't normal sobbing it was more like weeping. She stayed silent and just cried and cried. I didn't know what else to do other then to just sit and rock her. After about 15 minutes she was over it and was all smiles. This is when the language barrier becomes so difficult. It hurts your heart when a 4yr. old cries like that and you have no way of comforting her other then just holding her and praying over her. She did the same thing again Saturday night when we were trying to put her to bed. She just cried and cried. Finally she fell asleep and slept peacefully that night. We haven't had any issues since.

This is her and her little friend Piper after lunch last Sunday. I finally got to put her special Anthropologie dress on her. I have been saving this for months. Sunday was her first day at church. We didn't leave her in the child care. She stayed with us throughout the service. It was a bit overwhelming to her. We plan on keeping her with us for a while so she can get familiar with all of the faces and sounds.

She helped me make brownies for the Super Bowl. Isn't she just too cute in her little apron Daddy got her for Christmas?

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