Wednesday, March 20

To My Younger Momma Self

I saw this post on a friends blog. It made me think about what I would tell MY younger momma self. Not that I am an old momma or anything but what would I tell ME in my early momma days?

I would tell myself to not worry about what other mommas think of my mothering skills. To not conform to "their ways" but stick to what I felt was right for my baby.

I would tell myself that it is perfectly fine to nap when your baby is napping. Laundry, dishes, sweeping and dusting. It will always be there and it will be there when you wake up, tackle it then. It is ok to take a break and catch some zzz's. (I may be a little too good at this napping thing now! Ha!)

I would tell my self to not feel judged if I wasn't doing the "Baby Wise" thing. That it is OK to be a rescuer mom. I was never the momma who could let my little ones "Cry it Out". Or the momma who had my babies on a strict eat and sleep cycle. My babies lived life with me and kinda functioned around my schedule and their own. Not what and how a book told me. I would nurse my babies when they cried. Even if it had only been 30 minutes. I didn't make them wait until the "next scheduled feeding time". I mean we all need a little drink or snack don't we? And those precious nursing days are gone too soon. I cried when my last one refused the boob.

I would tell myself to not sleep with my babies in my bed. I recognize that for some co-sleeping and a "family bed" is good for your family and it works for you. After Parker I quickly realized that it is not our thing and I regretted ever starting it. Parker was 2 before he slept alone and all night. Beckham slept in his own bed in his own room at 2 weeks and he survived and wasn't emotionally damaged or scared from sleeping alone. Actually he was the happiest and most rested baby I knew. He was able to get a good nights rest with out being smooshed and jabbed all night just like his well rested momma.

I would tell myself that if my baby is 2 months old and I want to give him rice cereal in a bottle and my friends scorn to just roll it off. Who cares really and who writes these baby books on how, what to feed your babies and when?

I would tell myself that it is fine to let my 2 yr old have a pacifier. Relax other mommas. He's not gonna get married and still suck a paci. He will only be 2 once and his paci will only be his whole world for a blink.

I would tell myself to let my boys be boys. Let them climb, let them fall, let them seek things that bring a challenge and an adventure. Its born in them. It's in their bones. Let them expand their little boy wings and experience things that thrill their imagination. Don't hover and over protect. Don't be that mom who wont let him try to slide from the tallest slide at the park. Boys are adventurous. Let them be.

I would tell myself that if the food/paci/sippy cup falls on the floor and they stick it back in their mouth they will not die. Germs strengthen their immune system right?

I would tell myself to ask for help. When days get rough and you just need a break its totally fine to call a friend and say "HEY!!! I am suffocating over here and I need help! Can you watch ____ for a couple of hours so I can rest/clean/run an errand?" Don't try to play the perfect-well put together-I have this under control-I don't need help momma roll. You will wear yourself out and burn yourself out. What are friends for anyway?! Don't feel guilty for leaving them for a couple of nights to get away from kid chaos to spend quality time with your hubby. Your marriage is first before parenting. As is your sanity. Trust me. Everyone will be happier if you take a little time for some personal TLC and R&R.

And to those young momma's who were blessed with being a momma the way I was, young and 19. I want to say...Don't let the other momma's who are older then you tell you that you are doing it wrong. Or make you feel like you are less of a momma. You are momma's just the same. 19 or 29. It doesn't matter. Neither of us have this parenting thing figured out. Rely on the Lord and your inner momma voice. I would tell myself this if I could go back in time.

I would tell myself to spend less time being stressed about have the picture perfect kids. I would tell myself to relax and quit trying to correct and disciple to mold them into fairytale babies/toddlers. They grow fast and those days which seem so horrible are gone really quick. As I type this I am sitting next to my first baby who will be 7 next week. Oh how I wish he could be 1 yr old for just one more day. Or be 2 weeks old snuggling on my chest at 4am for one more day. Savor it. Enjoy it. Cherish it. Those little moments go fast and you really do forget those tiny frustrations. It's a snap of time and gone far to fast.

Finally I would tell myself to snuggle more, play more, sing with them more, get in the dirt with them more, kiss them more, love them more, be more patient with them, embrace more of those sweet moments, go after their hearts more. Encourage them more, pray for them more. Have more grace. Don't sweat the small stuff. And even some of the big stuff. Have grace with yourself. Not one of us parents are perfect. Even the Dr.'s and professionals who write the big books. Let the Holy Spirit guide you. Find rest in the Lord. Take care of yourself. Physically, emotionally and most of all Spiritually.

"He tends his flock like a shepherd: He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart; He gently leads those that have young." - Isaiah 40:11
One of my favorite scriptures for mothers like me who have young. The Lord gently leads you and cares for you. Let yourself be gently lead. Find your rest and encouragement in him. Let Him gently shepherd you in these early momma years.

2 Week old Parker and 19 yr old me. (Top)
4 Day old Beckham. We lost all of Beckham's baby pictures from the Hospital until he was 5 months old. Its devastating. I only have about 5 pics of him and this is one. 


  1. What a great post! This is honestly my first time visiting your blog so I have no idea how old your kids are or how long you have been in the "mommy business" but I still feel like a young mama even though my oldest is 4. I am still figuring things out and trying to give myself grace to do so. Thank you for such an encouraging post =)

    1. Thanks! My kids are 7, 4,4. I am certainly not a 'seasoned' momma. I am still learning and trying to navigate this momma hood too. XO!

  2. You definitely have a message moms of young children need to hear. Keep up the good work of encouraging and strengthening moms! -- A Grandma :-)

  3. Thanks for posting this!! So encouraging and a great reminder that my seven month old won't always be this little. I've heard it said "the days are long but the years are short".


Thanks for sharing your thoughts, love and encouragement.
It is always so appreciated.