Tuesday, February 22

2 Months Waiting

We have been on the official wait list with out agency for 2 months. We are waiting to be referred a little girl age 0-3. When the agency got our completed dossier at the beginning of December we were told that there were 7 families ahead of us on the wait list. The children on that our agency is advocating for right now are ages 6-12. We don't want to adopt an older child because we don't want Parker to feel replaced as the oldest child. So here we are, waiting, waiting for our little lady's face to show up on my email.

Clearing My Projects

"My garage looks like a flea market!" 
I have been collecting my awesome craigslist finds and junk shop treasures for awhile. I have a few unfinished projects that my dear husband basically demanded in a very kind and loving yet frustrated way that I need to get them done or he would chunk them. LOL So this last week I have been working on find fabric for a nasty yet awesome chairs I found. Painting some furniture I have piled up and hanging my chalkboard in my kitchen. Here are some pictures of what I have been working on. 

This double wingback chair will be covered in ...

THIS!!! I love it!! 

This was my inspiration....

Phillip doesnt like the black wooden part especially. He likes the more clean lines, Pottery Barn style. He agreed to an Anthropologie like fabric though. So YAY! It will be ready in about 3 weeks. 

 The plain cabinet before...
The board I painted with chalkboard paint...
Spray Painting....
Painted and hung up!! ;)

I love it!! 

Next I painted this $15 table my mom found. 

I painted it a semi-glossy grey! It is going in my sisters room. I plan on painting something on the top and middle part of it. I just need some inspiration... ;) 

This frame was once a bronze, gold and ivory frame. I painted it bright white for my nieces shabby chic nursery. 

I wil post more pics once it is in her room and hung up. 

One Life Worth Saving

Many of you have probably seen this picture. I have. I have seen it a lot. Every time I see it, it devastates me. It is a picture of a really small child being followed by a vulture. The other day I was browsing on of my blog friends sites and I came a across it. But this time there was a story behind it. The story of where the picture came from. I have posted below the article I found. It is heart wrenching. How can I not get involved?! After my eyes have been opened and I have seen how can I continue on the way I do?! This is alot of the reason why my husband and I have chosen Africa as our first international adoption. If all I can save if one, then that is one life worth saving from death by disease or starvation. 

See below....

Here is the story behind the photo....

Kevin Carter’s Pulitzer prize winning photo taken in 1993 during the Sudan famine, the picture depicts a famine stricken child being stalked by a vulture, the child is crawling toward a united nations food camp, located a kilometer away.
No one knows what happened to the child, including the photographer who left the scene as soon as the photo was taken. He later confided to friends that he wished he had intervened. Journalists at the time were warned never to touch famine victims for fear of disease.
Three months later, and only two weeks after being bestowed with the Pulitzer Prize, Kevin Carter committed suicide.
On 27 July 1994 Carter drove to the Braamfonteinspruit river, near the Field and Study Centre, an area where he used to play as a child, and took his own life by taping one end of a hose to his pickup truck’s exhaust pipe and running the other end to the passenger-side window. He died of carbon monoxide poisoning at the age of 33. Portions of Carter’s suicide note read:
“I am depressed … without phone … money for rent … money for child support … money for debts … money!!! … I am haunted by the vivid memories of killings and corpses and anger and pain … of starving or wounded children, of trigger-happy madmen, often police, of killer executioners…I have gone to join Ken if I am that lucky.”

Wednesday, February 16

Sifted Wheat

"Simon, Simon, Satan has asked to sift you as wheat. But I have prayed for you, Simon, that your faith may not fail. And when you have turned back, strengthen your brothers." 
- Luke 22:31-32

I am in the middle of leading my first women's bible study with a group of women I share life with. We are studying When Godly People to Ungodly Things by the fabulous Beth Moore. I was super excited about doing this study. I have heard what an amazing ministry it is, and how so many peoples lives were changed by her words, wisdom and the biblical truth of the enemy in the study. I know for sure that this study is for me right now in this season of my life. It has been brought to me by God, I know it has. I don't think it is a coincidence that our church is going through a sermon series right now called Hijacked: God Creates:Satan Twists, either. The enemy's schemes are tricky, smart, invading and they catch you totally off guard. The scripture says that ones who are at risk of falling are those who are standing firm. We have to be so careful. The enemy is exactly what scripture calls him out to be, a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. (1 Peter 5:8) I can just picture him crouching around my life, like a lion out in the wilderness does to his unsuspecting prey. He is prowling around waiting for a weak spot in my walls, and once he detects the tiniest crack or hint of distraction he goes in for the kill. 
Last week on the last day of our homework Beth started the study with a scripture that I cannot seem to shake. There is a particular part that has stuck with me and keeps coming up.
"Simon, Simon, Satan has asked to sift you as wheat....."
"Sift you as wheat...."
That phrase has stuck with me for over a week. 

Let me Rewind a bit....

For the last 6 months I have found myself in this battle with, well.... myself.  I have gone through seasons of being angry all the time, being jealous and envious of the ones in my life, resentful and full of hurt, I have been emotional. You get the picture. I have been kind of like a ticking time bomb.... never knowing what would set me off....

Don't get me wrong I do have really great days. I have more great days then I do bad, but those bad ones.... man they are bad. I have had more joy in the last 6 months and more contentment then I have had. I know the above completely contradicts what I just wrote but it is true. And it is very hard to explain. 

So this is where I am at, or where I have been at for the last couple of months. I have been walking around with this heaviness. I haven't been able to detect where it is stemming from, but it is there and it is real. As I began this study the feeling began to get heavier and harder to just "deal" with. It's like I am being shaken form the inside out.  The first few homework sessions have been on Satan, how he works, who he is and how to detect his schemes before you are devoured. The more I have been learning, I have been more restless and miserable I have been feeling. I have been so frustrated trying to figure out what the heck is going on with me. Am I depressed? Am I having anxiety? Then I read this scripture. Let me share it again....

"Simon, Simon, Satan has asked to sift you as wheat. But I have prayed for you, Simon, that your faith may not fail. And when you have turned back, strengthen your brothers."
 - Luke 22:31-32

I did a lot little research on sifting wheat so I could grasp the whole concept and context of Christ's words. I discovered that in ancient Israel sifting the wheat was the last step before the harvest. Before you sift the wheat you gather it together,  then the chaff/husk is winnowed (Winnow: separate (out)dividesegregate,sort out, filter outisolatenarrow downremoveget rid of.) Then the wheat is sifted or put through a sieve (strainer). During the sifting all of the impurities are removed from the wheat. Rocks, dirt, trash, bugs etc. 

So clearly, in this passage, Simon was already identified as wheat not the chaff/husk that is thrown out during the Winnowing. He was a devout follower. He loved Christ and walked with him. But he needed to be sifted. And he was sifted. If he wasn't sifted the Simon would have never left Peter. He came out stronger, he triumphed over Satan.

I have come to the conclusion that I am like wheat that is being sifted. There are things that need to be sifted from me before God can use me for his kingdom and to the full potential he has planned for me. I need to be sifted of seeking man's approval and not seeking Gods. The only true and pure approval comes from God not man. I tend to find my self worth though what people think about me. And whether or not they need me or if I am important to them. I focus all of my attention on seeking fulfillment from man and not God alone. All of the hurt from not getting that approval and feeling rejected creates sin in my life. It creates trash. This trash has been stuffed way down below my foundation (God). The more I pursue him the more this trash is being stirred and brought to the surface. That is where the sifting comes in. When all the junk is gathered and brought to the surface. The sifting process it to purify us and sanctify us. When the wheat is sifted, dirt, trash and all things impure to the wheat fall to the ground. They are removed. When we are sifted all of our funk and trash falls to the ground. The junk from our flesh is sifted out, removed. I pray that Christ prays for me the way he did Simon, that my faith will not fail but that I will stand firm and I will come out stronger. I dont want the funk from the world and my flesh to remain with me. I too want to be sifted and made pure.

Tuesday, February 8

Toolboxes, Boys & Treats

I have been waiting for what seems like months but really has only been 10 weeks for our educational toolbox from our agency. I have never in my whole life been so excited to get a box full of books to read and work books to work through!! I absolutely cannot wait to dive into these and get this behind me. It again is one more step to mark off the list in our journey.

The Box!!

It's Contents!!

Alot of Reading!

We are still waiting on a referral. It is painful. Somedays the pain is bad other days I don't really think about the adoption much. Lately I have felt under attack but I am a fighter. And with The Living God by my side I can conquer all. The enemy tries to invade me and its not fair. The things he tells me are cruel but he can't have me. I am eagerly waiting our referral but no longer obsessing over it. I know that God is working out every tiny detail in her sweet life. Every detail is very important to him even her birthdate. We don't know who Emerson is yet but I know she is out there somewhere.

Our boys are doing great! They are exhausting and challenging but I wouldn't trade them for anything. They are always up to something, fighting about something, wrestling, playing crazy gun games and super hero adventures. They are Crazy and I will never know where there energy comes from. But...I love to hear them laugh and have a good time.

The UniTowel

 They came up with this all on their own ;)

I have been working on some projects around the house to keep me from stalking all the waiting children sites and to keep me from going crazy during this wait. I have been trying to figure out a color for my laundry room since we moved in back in 2009. I think I finally found the perfect color! I am so in love. It makes me want to do laundry. Hey! Maybe thats the trick to getting laundry done! A pretty laundry room! LOL. 

I LOVE the word "Agape" I got these letters from Anthropologie to remind me daily of God's love and to love like Christ loves. The Grey frame is a cheap frame a found and painted and strung some twine from one side of the frame to the other to clip our lost socks on! I love it and it really does help!

Here are my pretty new knobs from Anthropologie. They are so sweet! I love it. 

One last thing... I have stepped out of my comfort zone and I am leading a bible study with our life group girls this semester. It is called When Godly People Do Ungodly Things. It is great! If you haven't done it I highly recommend it. It is by Beth Moore! She rocks! But since the study started I have been feeling this heavy emotional depression anxiety stuff. I don't know what it is stemming from but I don't like it! Actually... I know it is the enemy. Today was an emotional day...for no reason. To cheer me up the boy whom I fancy and the boy whom I am bound to sent me a sweet treat! He is so good to me

Tuesday, February 1

Snow Day Projects

It actually snowed here in West Texas last night! We have SNOW on the ground!! Since it snowed I decided to keep Parker home from school today so he could emjoy this rare occasion. Turns out he still doesn't like the snow. The fact that we have no heavy coat, gloves, scarf or hat probably has alot to do with it. We never need those things here. They have enjoyed running out side and filling cups up with snow and eating it. We have stayed in all morning doing "projects" and playing. I really wanted to finish my awesome $5.99 table I found, so I let the boys make a huge mess of their toys in the living room. Parker literally that I was the most amazing mom ever. He told me about 1,000 times how cool I was for letting him play in the living room. (They have their own room for toys...THEIR Playroom)
So here is what my table looks like after some TLC and some SBD magic...



I'm not sure yet what I want to put on it yet, but this will do for now.

Top Detail....

Voila!! Now I need some awesome hardware for the doors! The hunt is on!

 While the paint was drying before I could sand the top....I started on another project. I usually have 4 or 5 going at once. LOL My husband thinks I am crazy and I make him crazy. He will never understand me! :) 

I stole the idea from Anthropologie. 

Theirs is a little more blan and dull than I normally like and it is $$$ so I decided to do a little research and try to create my version of the piece. Here is what I have come up with so far...

I will fill each frame with a mirror after I find all the right size and antique them. All of these frames came from a local thrift store and cost me $12 all together. Not bad...