Thursday, September 30

Bumps and Bruises

This weekend I felt a little like this...

Not physically but spiritually. I feel so challenge and drained. I was definitely beaten up by the enemy this weekend. I let him into one tiny thought and it spread like wildfire. I know that God has his hand all over this adoption. This is something we have prayed for and longer for. I know that God has the perfect little girl out there for us. We were praying about these two sweet one year old girls at the orphanage we are adopting from this last week. I felt so burdened because I felt like the first time I saw either of their pictures I didn't feel connected and felt like God was telling me No. I prayed for them anyway. Sometimes I think I know best. I felt like by saying no these girls weren't a fit I was rejecting them.  I wonder sometimes if I will know when I see a my daughter, if I will know right away if it is her or if it will take some time. I am so frightened that I will reject her not knowing that it is her. These are all the kinds of thoughts I had over the weekend. The enemy took hold of those thoughts and grew them into these big nasty thoughts. Thoughts with resentment and jealousy towards those who already know their kids that are waiting on them. Thoughts about whether or not I am capable of doing this. Thoughts about am I really hearing from God that I am called to do this. I was beat up and shook up. I was a wreck. Phillip prayed over me and we stood on God's promise that the truth sets us free, and that I would be freed of those thoughts. Sunday went by and I still battled these thoughts. Monday rolled around and I still was in battle. Tuesday rolled around and I was feeling discouraged, no progress. I was frustrated because I felt like God wasn't giving me a word when I had been begging and pleading praying for one. Just a very prophetic simple word of encouragement was all I was asking for. That afternoon around 12 a sweet friend of mine called and loved on me. She gave me the most beautiful word. God used her to love on me. He does hear me and but he waits until I will listen before he reveals himself to me. He waits until my pity party is over. I asked her to email me some of what God was saying to her so I could print it and keep it as a reminder. Here is some of what she revealed to me through email....

I hope this comforts you, but I felt in my prayer time that the Lord showed me that you would allow her to go to another family. I had hoped that the other family would have been the one. So I definitely think you guys are absolutely hearing GOD!!! I know we think sometimes, WHAT DOES THAT EVEN REALLY MEAN??? It is difficult to even trust ourselves at times to know whether GOD is speaking or if our EMOTIONS are. It is also especially difficult when you are adopting to look at a child's face and have to pray about whether or not they are for your family without feeling like you are choosing a pet. Having said all this, I see a bigger picture.

I know that through this process, you will have an added family member! However, I also believe that this is not it!!!! God is using this situation to not only give you both the desire of your heart but to allow you to become "MATURE" in Him. This makes me so excited for you both because when God gives us these OPPORTUNITIES he wants to take us to the next level!!!!! With great REWARD comes great RESPONSIBILITY! God is looking around at his children looking for the ones that CAN HANDLE IT!!! I believe that you and Philip CAN HANDLE IT!!!  He is probably giving you several different opportunities to LOOK at a situation (CHILD) and have to pray and truly seek him to help you learn to LISTEN and DECIDE!!!!!

There was much more to what she shared. I was challenged by one thing she left out of the email. She reminded me that from here on out it is all how we respond to what God is calling us to do. We can either run and hide from it or we can face it head on. I pray that I am like Samuel and when I hear the Lord calling I will respond with "Speak Lord, your servant is listening." This process is draining and emotional to say the least. But oh so rewarding. If it draws me more near to my Lord then I would keep doing it over and over again. If it saves the soul of my daughter and the ones she will reach in her life time then Lord I am ready. We are ready. Use us. Speak to us. We are listening. We will persevere, even during the hardest of days. 

Galatians 6:9 
Let us not become weary in doing good, for
at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.

~j


Tuesday, September 28

Adoption Fund Project

Ok... So I have been busy at work trying to help raise money for a friend who is adopting. She has two sweet kids waiting for her and her family to rescue them from Ethiopia. Click here to read their story. I posted earlier about my pay it forward pay pal button at the right of my screen. If you would like to donate to them just click the button and enter an amount. Even if all you have is $25, that is $25 closer to getting these kids to their forever family. Also, I have been making some hair accessories with my lovely sister to help with the cause. Here are some pics of what you can purchase if you are interested. And they are going to a great cause.

 Blue linen headband
Yellow rosettes... Very cute...
 Rosette Headband
 Natural linen headband
 Super cute door sweater (I call them that because they are made of wool yarn ;) )
You can tell  me what color, how many flowers, ruffles, or holiday accessories or all three. One like this is $25.


I am working on some canvases and furniture. Once I get them complete I will post some pictures. Please think about helping my friends bring their babies home where they will be loved and safe. 

~j

Monday, September 27

Momma... I'm wise

Today Parker informed me in the car that he is wise. The conversation went something like this...

Parker: "Momma, did you know that I am wise."
Me: "Really? What does wise mean Parker?"
Parker: "Wise means that you remember everyone's name and who they are, and that you know what is good and bad. It means that you know when you are doing the bad thing and when you are going to get in trouble and you should really do the good thing."
Me: "Wow Parker, that is wise."
Parker: "But I'm just 4 year old wise. I'm not big year old wise yet. But when I am big like daddy, I am going to be big wise.
I love the heart of my child. I can't figure out where he learned this whole "wise" thing from. I am hoping that the Lord is speaking to his heart at the young age. Parker is special and he has a special heart. When there little truths come out of him it melts my heart.

Thursday, September 23

Welcome Fall

Dear Fall,
Summer has offically come and gone. I gladly welcome you. I am ready for chill in the air, color on my trees, warm fall smells and pumpkin picking with my kids. I am ready for some cool cozy nights with an extra blanket on my bed when I snuggle my love. Sweaters and boots, oh how I have missed you. 
Welcome Fall. 




xoxo jenna

Brave One

Parker had 5 shots on Tuesday. He was really concerned that they would hurt, but he put on his brave face and took it like a man. His reward was Ice-cream and a new gun if he didn't cry. Guess what... He didn't cry.  So here he is donning his new cowboy attire.

So brave and serious 

Wednesday, September 22

24 and Counting

The big 2-4! 24th year welcomed me this past friday. I woke up to snuggles and laughter. It was a great day. Parker and I took Beckham to school, which is always exciting for Parker. He loves to spend the mornings with me. But he was especially excited this morning. It was my Birthday! He loved that it was just me and him on my special day. He showered me with kisses and drew me the most beautiful cards. When it came time to take him to school. He hid under the table and cried the most devastating cry I have heard. He was heartbroken that he had to go to school on my birthday. He literally told me this "I wanted to spend the day with the Birthday day princess!!" Tears continuing at this point and streaming down his little round face. I couldn't decide if I was being sensitive or not so I called my bf and asked her if it were her son crying to stay home with her on her birthday would she let him play hooky. She said "for sure!" So I gave in and let him hang out with me. He was wonderful! He loved on me and kissed on me, he made me feel like a great momma. Later that day our social worker came over and took pictures of our house for our home study (she is wonderful). After she left I scrambled to get ready for dinner with my hubby and dear friends. I wan panicked because I was running out of time and we had reservations at this great restaurant in Odessa. running about 15 minuets behind we pulled up in my friends alley, which i gave hubby a hard time about. (it is so weird to pick your friends up in their garage for a double date, isn't it?) Any way we pulled up and she ran out. She was super excited and want to show me the new pictures our agency director had sent her of her sweet girls before we left. So we ran inside to get a quick peak. When I ran through the back door and looked up all of my friends and family were there standing in her kitchen yelling SURPRISE!!! It was AWESOME!!!! Best SURPRISE!!! EVER!!! I was so shocked I actually did a funny cry laugh. I cannot believe that everyone pulled it off. I loved it. They had a yummy meal catered and sweet gifts. My best friend, husband and mom gave the best speeches to me. I truly felt loved! I know for sure that this next year and the years to come will be the best I've had. Thank you all for loving me and supporting me on my special day! You are all awesome and loved as well.

The whole gang!
My mom and dad
Our besties, Lana and Jae
Parker drew me as Tinkerbell in her lantern for my birthday 
Me as the Birthday Princess









Monday, September 20

Pass it Forward



Lately my heart has had a burning desire to serve. In my head I think I need to be over seas.  I'm thinking, lets pack up, sell everything and go live in Addis Ethiopia. My heart longs to be near these children and families. But realistically right now, in this season of my life, God is not telling me, or my husband that I can or we can go or that we are even supposed to go. He is however placing a burden on my heart for these people. I love how God places sensitivity on your heart in an areas but doesn't tell you why or what to do with that. You are just supposed to search you heart, search the word, seek his face, and desire his will and slowly, sometimes rapidly things will start working its self out and God will start revealing his heart to you. I talked to a new friend on the phone the other day about how amazing God is and how his plan is so beautiful. He is the most creative orchestrator. Over the last 6 months there has been bizarre things happen that now make complete sense. I met my new sweet friend at my best friends 30th Birthday party back in June. Many of you know her. Here is her blog. Go read it! I never really thought much about meeting her at the time. I thought "Wow she's fun" and went on. Over the course of the remainder of June and July other crazy things happened like my dream, my best friends quirky adoption dream, the discovery of Korah and us adopting. Well it turns out that my new friend has a younger sister who went on the mission trip to Korah! And she was apart of the team that went with the blog I talked about earlier. Now her sister is moving there in November to live among the least of these and show them the Love of our God! Amazing! So my new friend, and I are adopting kids from the same orphanage and using the same agency. As well as my best friend who is adopting the sweet girls I fell in love with. God is BEAUTIFUL!!  God has been conducting these things for months now and it is all falling together. Beautifully. Since my body can't be in Ethiopia it has to be here I am trying to find way to serve people and love on people. God has placed on our hearts to help families who are trying to raise money to adopt. So I am going to try my best to raise some money for my new sweet friend! If you are friends with me on Facebook you may have noticed I have made a few little hair accessories. I can paint furniture and canvas' as well. Hopefully I can post some pics soon of furniture and canvas' I have done. But all of the profit will go towards them getting their sweet kids home. With in the next day or so I will set up a Pay Pal button on the side of my blog. You can use this to purchase something from me or to simply donate to them. Will you please help me bring these precious kids home? Click here to read their story.  Also please feel free to send our blog address to all of your friends and family. Our friends, and us, need as many prayers as we can get during this journey. 

~j

Wednesday, September 15

Beautiful Lord

I love days when the Lord loves on you. I also love the days when the Lord gives you sift kick in the butt behind and reminds you where you came from and that you are being totally selfish & bratty ungrateful and unappreciative of what he has done in your life. Sometimes I lose sight of what the Lord has done or is doing. I get so wrapped up in this world and all that goes on day to day that I take for granted his grace and his beauty. He is truly a beautiful God. I am so thankful that each day comes with new mercies and new forgiveness. I am so grateful that I can be new in him everyday. Oh how he loves me. I have been a little concerned or down about the adoption process. I wonder sometimes if I can handle the stress of one more baby or if I can handle the steps it is going to take to get her here. There is a lot of information thrown at me constantly. If any of you know me, I tend to be a little bit spacey and unorganized. The process is demanding me to be on top of things and to be organized and to be bold when I need to be. It is a stretch and I often feel drained and worn out. But it is definitely worth it. I see this challenge kind of like the birth pains and the discomfort of pregnancy. It’s not easy at times to be pregnant. The swelling feet, the achy back, the weight gain, sleepless nights, contractions, etc. Well, instead of those things I have headaches from stress, exhaustion from not sleeping because all I can think about is her being here and her getting all the love she needs while she's not with me. I am full of worry and I feel insecure in my ability to care for one more.  We have many hurdles to jump but I know that once we are in Ethiopia and they hand her over to me everything will be fine and everything will be ok. I know I will fall in love with her more in that moment than I am with her now. It will be like when the Dr. handed me my boys for the first time. I cannot wait to hold her and to read to her. I cannot wait to sing to her and bathe her. I cannot wait to love on her and to teach her. I cannot wait to introduce her to all of the special people in my life. I pray daily that God is growing and protecting her, whether she is in her mother’s womb or on the streets or in the orphanage. I pray that she is healthy and strong. God is so good and so big and he does not forget his people. I know that he knows her and he knows we are her forever family. We talked to our agency earlier this week and they told us we will be #14 on the wait list once our dossier is complete (which will be soon I hope) With that being said the director thinks it will be about March that we get a picture of the perfect child God has chosen for us. If we accept her in March we will hopefully meet her in May and bring her home sometime in June or July. Those months cannot come soon enough. I am ready to hold her and smell her. I am so ready to feel her little body and here her heart beat. It is like having a really long pregnancy. We decided to go ahead and name her. Her name will be Emerson. Everyone refers to her as Emerson. So the new addition to our family is Emerson. Parker knows that Emerson is his sister and that she doesn't have a family in Ethiopia but we are her family here. We are still playing with middles names, it might be her African name we aren't 100% sure yet. So be praying for our sweet Emerson and that God will deliver her to us safely. It is so surreal that we are adopting a girl and she has a name. Emerson; I cannot say it enough.  We are so thankful for all of your prayers we really need it in this journey of faith. 

My Hero...Err My HEROS!

I love love LOVE being a momma of boys! They continually melt my heart and amaze me. Their zeal for life is inspiring. They are adventurous, creative, strong, confident, handsome and just flat out fun! One day last week they insisted on being called "Spiderman" and "Captain America" neither one of them responded to me when I called them by Parker or Beckham. They must have some kind of brotherly pact between each other to gang up on me.  So Spiderman, Captain America and I spent this really hot and miserable lovely afternoon outside. I pretended to be the damsel in distress while they set out to save me. Of course this time of role play was not allowed in the back yard, that was completely out of the question. Per the demands of my HEROS we played in the front yard. It was hot and miserable lovely.  These are the memories that I hope will stick with them for a life time. I had to capture some on camera. I hope to never forget these sweet moments. I am so in love with my little HEROS!

My Spiderman and Captain America
Whoosh!!
If any of you know Beckham you know this is his famous Superhero pose. Bumm Bumm!! Then he's off. 

Laughing at himself trying to sneak my energy drink ;)

Monday, September 13

Facebook Fast


So, sometime in the middle of July I felt like God was telling me to deactivate my Facebook and take a "break" from Facebook. I was clearly spending way too much time browsing everyone’s page and just checking out their lives and what everyone was doing. Shamefully and embarrassing enough Facebook slowly became more important then playing with the boys, laundry and more importantly my time with the Lord. Usually I spend naptime working on a devotional and in the Word, but this summer I put those things aside to be on Facebook. I fought God on this for a while. I really like being able to see my friend’s kids grow up who don't live around me, and I like to hear news about whose is getting married, who is pregnant, who’s having a boy or a girl, etc.  But the longer I ignored the voice telling me to "sign off" the more irritable I became and the more annoyed I got during my Facebook browsing. Not annoyed at anyone but annoyed that I was sitting there doing nothing but browsing. I became restless and uncomfortable. So I confided in some friends and told them how I was feeling and they encouraged me to take my "break" and deactivate my account. They held me accountable. So the last week of July I deactivated. The first day was hard because I am nosey, lol, but it got easier. During my break from the "Facebook world" I dedicated that time to spending time with the Lord. We all know He is jealous of our time, so I acknowledged that and spent time with him. I am so amazed at what he has shown me during my "break". He has spoke to me and loved on me. He has shown me my talents and where my heart is. He has shown me what I am supposed to be doing with my time and where I am supposed to serve. All it took was a tiny step of submission and obedience. I challenge you to submit to the Lord if he is calling you to something, even if it is something as tiny as taking a break from Facebook or TV. He will bless that sacrifice and time. He will show you his heart and his will, he just needs you to be open and willing to hear. God loves you and he jealous of your time too

During this time I got all my adoption stuff filled out and sent in. Now we are just waiting. God has shown me a new love for the orphans. With the talents God has given me I plan on helping support other families who are trying to adopt. This process is very long and expensive. So I have been doing a number of things. I will be making cute headbands and hair-clips, painting furniture and canvas', whichever. I will also be a making other random thing, seeing that I am learning to sew. ;) The name of this "project" will be Small Bird. Jenna means small bird, and there is another significant meaning behind it. Please contact me if you are interested in me creating something special for you. All of the profit will go to families in the adoption process. I will post here and on Facebook prices of the things I make. You can email me at jennaknight@gmail.com. 

Thursday, September 9

Keep Calm and Craft On


I love crafts. Though I have not done them in a while up until now. I have always wanted to use my creative side but never made time for it. Until recently. I have been overloaded with ideas. I am always looking for a new project. Since Parker is in school from 12-3 and Beckham naps from 12-3. I have decided to designate that Craft Time! I am so excited. It is like therapy to me. To be able to create something is so refreshing. I recently was given a sewing machine and I am learning to sew. (which I love) I have been repainting or half bath and redecorating it. (I am going a new direction) And I am beautifying a cheap lamp from Target, painted a canvas for a friend, as well as trying my hand at sweet hair clips and headbands for some little friends of the boys. Here are some pictures of what I have been working on.


"Vintage Toy Story Pez Wall Art" for my sweet friend.
It will has a big frame around it when complete.
Original lamp in Pictures in the Last post... fabric rosettes will go all the way around the bottom and top. Maybe I'll post more pics later. Some of the hair things are gifts so I don't want to share them yet. ;)






Interesting Places..

To poop that is....

Early morning "business"

Later that day "business"

I apologize for the blurry picture he was trying to escape as fast as he could once he was caught :)


These are the places I found Beckham "taking care of business" yesterday.  He is always so ashamed of what he has done. He feels the need to hide, then deny. When he has taken care of business and you ask him what he did he says "nooo" in the sweetest innocent voice. It is hilarious. I have tried to sit him on the potty but it infuriates him. When I ask him why he doesn't want to be big and sit on the potty his only response is... "ba-cause" LOL so for now we will watch him hide and document this time of potty refusal for future embarrassment. ;)

Open My Eyes


We have completed the majority of our paper chase to get our sweet baby. Now we are waiting for approval on the home study and the application. We are in the process of the dossier. This whole adoption process is so foreign and overwhelming at times. I feel like I am being lead by hand in a dark room with my eyes closed, just trusting those who have done this before to guide me in the right direction. We had our home study interview on Monday, it were great. Parker was excited before our social worker came over. He asks daily if this is the day we will go get sister. He prays for her and wishes for her. It is precious. I love how innocent he is. He understands that we are getting a sister from Ethiopia but doesn't understand why she doesn't have a mommy or a home like he does. He also doesn't understand why we have to wait so long. Yesterday during what was supposed to be his nap time he got out the baby crib-mattress from under his bed, gathered some sheets and pillows and made his new sister a place to sleep in his room. He is so ready. I cannot wait to see him with her. Beckham on the other hand has no clue. I worry about his adjustment. He makes it clear to everyone and anyone who is around that I am his mommy. Beckham is my sweet and tender child. He loves quality time and physical affection. And he doesn't like to share me with anyone. He wants me all to him self. Maybe this is normal for the youngest in the family. (Maybe a new addition in hard for every child who is the youngest in the family.) I don't know. I am praying now that God is protecting his heart and he is preparing him for the change and it will come easier than expected.  

I have been praying a lot lately that God will help my kids understand, even at this young age, what we are doing and why we are doing it. I am excited to change the face and flow of our family. I want my boys to grow up with the kind of compassion I am learning to have through this process. Since we have been obedient to the call of adoption I have learned a new way of loving people. It's like I woke up one day and had a new sense and understanding of compassion. I see everyone differently. Like I am more aware of them and where they might be in their life or what they may be going through.

Last week, on my way to pick Parker up from school while I was stuck at a red light, (there was an accident or something), I prayed that God would not only soften my heart for the least of these in Ethiopia but also those that are here in need. While I can't be there loving on people and serving people the way Christ did, I want to do it here. I prayed that he would show me areas of need, areas of hopelessness in people, areas where he can use a small bird like myself. As I sat there my attention was drawn to a lady next to me with a look of despair on her face. She seemed sad or stressed. My mind began to run with a million questions. i.e. Where is she going? Where does she live? Where has life taken her? What is she rejoicing? What is she mourning? Does she have family? Who and What does she love? Does she know my Lord? Does her heart yearn for more of God? (I know I sound like a crazy lady but really this is what was going through my head in a matter or 3 seconds) I don't know the answer to any of those questions but what I do know is that her creator loves her and he knows the answers. So I prayed that God would just love on her and embrace her through whatever she was going through. Whatever it was. I say all this to say that I feel softened and tender towards those I don’t even know. God is continually remodeling my heart. I am so grateful for this process of adoption he has used it to bless my family, to bless my friends, to open my eyes to the world. He has used it to show his character, his heart and his will. He has shown me how to have genuine love for people no matter who you are. I have learned to love my family differently, and how to show them I love them. My marriage has been transformed and my relationship with my boys has been transformed. The God who created us is so good and so big! I am looking forward to this journey. 

Wednesday, September 1

Remodeling of a Heart

Today in my time with the Lord, all I could do was sit back and smile at what he is doing. We serve an amazing God. A God who is so in love with us that he disciplines us when we are walking in disobedience to get our attention then loves on us when we are down and discouraged. I have been walking in amazement of him today. He has been “remodeling” my heart for sometime time now. I have had my “flesh” torn off and my heart “ripped” out, so that I could be put back together again, as a new creation. It is so funny now that the pieces are fitting together. He is so clever and his plan is perfect. I love how he uses circumstance to grow and teach us. And how he uses people to be his voice and sometimes his arms. This past winter God started tearing away some of the “walls” in my heart. The beginning stages of my “remodel” were ugly, humbling, and painful but necessary. It was for sure not the fun part of being made new. I walked through things that I didn’t understand. Things that didn’t make sense to me but I just knew that I needed to be submissive and open to what he was doing. God sees what he is doing and he knows the outcome. I had to trust him even though my human eyes couldn’t see what he was doing. There were things he brought to my attention that needed to be repaired, fixed or discarded but I ignored him and the longer I did the more painful that restoration was. During this process I became more and more hungry to know the heart of the God I serve, and to know and understand his character better. I was starving for more of him. The more I tuned into the Lord the more I could hear his voice. And the more he used the people around me to reveal his master plan. I began seeking God and asking him to give me anything, a word, a dream, a passage, a book, a sermon. Anything that revealed his heart and his plan. I was ready and I was waiting. This spring God started giving me little glimpses of what he was doing. I had a really vivid dream one night that threw me for a loop. I had several different interpretations of my dream and I had been given an interpretation of that dream that made sense but I wasn’t sure if that was it, until recently. (Maybe I will post my dream later; I haven’t shared it with many.) All I knew this spring was that I desired to live radically for the Lord but I wasn’t sure what that looked like. I mean really, what does “radical” look like. Does it look like selling everything I own and moving to a remote nation and preaching the word or just simply loving on people the way Christ did. Or could it mean living radically here by the boundaries my family has and our standards of life and our service for our community. I was really frustrated because I wanted to know what it looked like now. For months I talked with Phillip about what a radical life looked like and how are we supposed to live that way.  This whole time God was working in Phillip also. I prayed and prayed for God to reveal to us what he meant when he told me that we should live radically.

This is where the fun part of my remodel comes in. (Paint for the walls, pretty knew flooring, new furniture, you know the fun stuff.) God started placing things on my heart that I knew were from him because honestly I wouldn’t naturally consider these things for me to do. In April God placed a burden in my heart for the least of these, people who live without the basic necessities, people who seem to have no hope. My heart started breaking. I feel like during this time of seeking the Lord he clearly spoke to me and told me to adopt. I was reading some blogs one day that I follow about other families adopting, and I came across this family who was trying to adopt from Uganda but had their adoption put on hold because the mother found out she was expecting. (I guess you can’t adopt from Uganda if you are pregnant.) I scrolled through her blog reading her heart and her heartbreak and I came across a video from YouTube. It was a normal video of the devastation in Africa. I have seen a million of these videos before but never in my whole life had it ever ripped my heart out and stomped on it the way this video did. I will post it below. But beware it is heart breaking, you will need the whole box of tissue for this.
Absolutely heartbreaking, but the unfortunate reality for far, far too many children around this world.  After watching this and soaking my desk with tears I knew there needed to be change. These people need to know that their God and their creator had not forgotten them. They are important and loved. They are apart of God’s masterpiece. I cried out to the Lord that night and begged him to show me away to help. I want to be your hands and feet Lord!! This is not OK!!! I was seriously depressed for weeks after seeing this and I was obsessed with “blog stalking” trying to find away to get involved and to help.

In July, during my blog stalking and adopting research, one of my very best friends had a dream. (Another, God given dream!! Keep reading…) She came over one day and was like “So, I had this dream that I adopted this little girl from Africa and I named her Korah, so weird huh?” So weird, this friend had never really talked much about adoption, not that she, at this time, wouldn’t consider it. It just wasn’t what God had placed on her heart yet. I agreed that her dream was “different”, and we went on with our play date. About 5 days later, I stumbled upon this blog. (I encourage you to read this blog. It is long but so worth it.) This is where my heart is. KORAH!! Ok, God I am listening! What are you trying to tell me? I shared this new discovery with Phil and the place grew in his heart as well. We both felt a tenderness for what this team is doing. I began to do research about this mission trip and the group that went and who they were through.  That is how I discovered the organizations on the side of my page. God at this point was yelling through a mega phone! We immediately prayed about this new little wonder and asked God to show us need and where we can help. He is still revealing some of that to us.  I did text my friend that day when I discovered Korah. I was like “hey remember your crazy dream about adopting that little girl from Africa and naming her Korah. Well I just discovered this village in Africa called Korah. I think you are not naming your daughter Korah you are getting her there.”  Now they have a beautiful little story in the makings. CRAZY!! God is good.  So, this is the place that God has placed our hearts. Addis Ababa, Ethiopia and their little village in the landfill called Korah. When will we get to go there we are not sure. But we know we will. But what I do know is that we are adopting from Addis, Ethiopia and we couldn’t be more terrified, excited, thrilled, nervous, anxious or joyful about it. We have had crazy confirmation on which agency to use. And we are ready to walk the path God has laid out for us. We know it will be hard and faith building but I don’t think we are called to do the easy and comfortable. We are called to go and do the hard and uncomfortable. So for us, our family, right now, we have been called to love the least of these and to adopt a sweet baby and make them our own. So welcome to our journey as God remodels our hearts, family and our lives. 

Matthew 18:5 reads "And whoever welcomes a little child like this in my name welcomes me." Oh, Lord how I want to welcome you. I want to be your hands and feet. I want to love your people the way you love us. I want to adopt an orphan into my family that way God adopted us in to his. I want to make this child a coheir in my family. I want to share and show your love to them. 


From Phillip:


Jenna and I had a conversation maybe a year ago about adoption.  We both agreed that "someday we should adopt".  Guess what?  Someday never gets here, and I hid behind that.  After watching the video above I had a new weight on my heart.  God asked me "what would do if these children were in your backyard"?  What would you do if you discovered these children starving and dying at Beal Park?  "Well God I would take them home and take them in".  He said "exactly".  I found myself in a miserable place.  God's word to me was this "I have blessed you with more than you need, I have given you an abundance of seed, and what have you done with it?"  Lord, I have eaten the seed you gave me.  I have stored it up for myself.  Couple these feelings and conversations with my renewed understanding of Christ's salvation and sacrifice and I now have a purpose.  Before we knew Christ we were orphans, separated from God by our sins. Through Christ who paid the price of our sins, we can be made new and receive forgiveness.  We can start over!  At the same time we are adopted as sons of God.  We are no longer alone, we are brothers and sisters of others who are in Christ and sons and daughters of the creator.  I say all of this to explain that my heart is burdened for the children of this world who are alone, fatherless, and who do not have an inheritance.  I have been adopted and given an inheritance.  Remembering the separation and loneliness I cannot leave another child to suffer the same.  I will close with a quote I read:


"Sometimes I would like to ask God why He allows poverty, famine, and injustice in the world, when He could do something about it...but I'm afraid He might ask me the same question."


-Anonymous